Tainted Hope
by Kurisuti
Summary: After a fateful attack during a full moon, Remus finds himself spending his last year at Hogwarts with the victim. But Avalon is more then what she seems. She, Severus, and the Marauders are pulled into a conspiracy surrounding the rise of the Dark Lord.
1. Two Weeks

Disclaimer: Avalon McKay is of my own creation, no touchy! Everything else (besides actual plot, or lack thereof) belongs to the ever so talented J.K. Rowling.   
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
  
Chapter One  
  
The girl was just sitting there, next to the pond. The full moon overhead reflected the wolf's flashing grin at his unsuspecting prey. The girl knew he was there and turned to face him. The wolf lunged. The girl screamed. The moon turned red with an innocent's blood.  
  
Remus jerked awake and glanced around the cabin. Three pairs of eyes stared back at him, wide in surprise. The boy next to him spoke first as he pushed his glasses back up on his face.  
  
"Are you okay Remus?" James Potter asked with concern.  
  
"I..." Remus stopped. He wanted so badly to tell his friends of the horrible events that transpired that summer. Yet, he was worried that he would frighten them away.   
  
Sirius spoke up first, "Judging by that look on your face, I'd say you were contemplating not telling us."  
  
"You know you can tell us anything Remus." Piped in Peter. "We aren't going to judge and sentence you. You know us better then that."  
  
James spoke up once more, "Maybe there's something we can do to help out if you told us?"  
  
Remus shook his head and looked out the window. Trees, fields, and pastures whirled by as the Hogwarts Express took them to the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It would be his and his companions last year at Hogwarts, and it was already starting out horrible. A few moments went by and his friend wondered if Remus would say anything at all and then he did.  
  
"I attacked a girl this summer," Remus waited for some kind of outrage response, but only received a strangely encouraging silence, urging him on in his story. "This past full moon. I was staying at an uncle's cabin in the woods, away from cities and town or any other homesteads. At least that's what I thought. I was out roaming the woods, passing the time and hoping the moon would fade as soon as possible. The wolf... I heard someone moving about and followed the sound. I wanted to stop, to turn around and go the other way. The wolf wouldn't allow it though and we discovered a young girl sitting next to the pond. I didn't know what she was doing out there. But she was there and she was very human." Remus paused, the memory surging anew in his mind.   
  
The girl had been beautiful. Long black hair with hints of silver highlights. A slender body and slightly tanned skin. "She heard us...me approaching and turned towards me." Her eyes. He couldn't forget them, "She didn't seem afraid though. Surprised, and a little alarmed, but not afraid. The wolf lunged at her, eager to pass on this damn curse." The pale boy gave a dry chuckle, void of any humor. "She knocked me hard upside the head, threw me off balance. The wolf didn't like that though and attacked again."  
  
Remus looked down at his clenched hands and tried to relax them, "Slashed her across the face. Blood everywhere. I heard shouts and managed to convince the wolf to leave." He leaned forward and covered his face with his hands. Nothing was said for a while. Remus was afraid to look up, look at the faces of his companions. What would they think of him now?  
  
"Anything from the cart, boys?" The voice of an elder woman made Remus jump in surprise. With a glance at Remus, James pulled out some money from his pocket and handed it to the dimpled, old witch.  
  
"Four chocolate frogs please," She smiled and handed him the chocolate. She hesitated for a moment and then handed them four more chocolate frogs. "You lot look like you could use some cheering up! These are on the house...but don't tell anyone." With a wink, she slid the cabin's door shut again.  
  
He had to admit it, he did feel a little better after munching on the frog. "What card did you get Remus?" Inquired Peter.  
  
Remus shrugged and looked down at the card, and couldn't help but grin. "I got the new Dumbledore card!"   
  
"No way!"  
  
"You can't be serious!"  
  
"He's not...I am."  
  
The four boys sat there for a moment and then burst out laughing.  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
For the rest of the journey, Remus' mood greatly improved. The four boys spoke of the upcoming year and shared any plans they might have for after graduation. At last, as the sun disappeared from view, the Hogwarts Express reached its destination in Hogsmeade. Going from cabin to carriage seemed to excite the boys even more.  
  
Nothing seemed to be able to pull Remus back down, especially tonight! The group took their usual place at the Gryffindor table. The room quickly filled up and many were updating their house of the past summer's events. Remus casually listened to James telling a few other Gryffindor's about a professional Quidditch match he was able to attend. Someone sat down in the seat across the table from him but when he looked to see if he knew them, his blood went cold. Gold eyes glanced hesitantly at him then went back to staring down at the table.  
  
Those eyes. In the forest the same alert eyes seared into his very soul. But the long silver/black hair was gone. She had cut it...or rather had hacked it all off. Even shorter then James' mess on top his head. She glanced around nervously again, as though trying to hide something. As she looked back in his direction, he saw why. A long, hideous scar stretched horizontally from above her right eyebrow and down to her left cheek. Two fainter scars paralleled the large one on either side.   
  
He did that. That horrible scar was his doing. He had destroyed her life! Not only scarring her physically, but spiritually with this damn curse. The wolf had won. He could never forgive himself.  
  
By this point, James had notice the change in Remus next to him. He looked over at his friend and then across the table to where he was staring. He could feel the tension thick in the air and he knew he'd have to break it somehow.  
  
With a grin he reached his hand across the table to the girl, "I don't believe we've met. I'm James Potter." The girl started but took his hand in a shake. "I feel rather embarrassed really, this being our final year and we've never met!"  
  
The girl managed a smile, "Avalon McKay..." She looked over at Remus. "And who are you?"  
  
Remus just sat there, staring at her until someone kicked him hard in the leg. Sirius had obviously joined the conversation. "Ow!.. er... I'm Remus Lupin."  
  
She quirked an eyebrow but nodded. Peter and Sirius introduced themselves as well. Avalon seemed much more cheerful now. Obviously the mark on her face had not been received well by others and she was glad for the respite. They quieted down a bit as new students were sorted into houses but started the conversation up again as food appeared before them. Only Remus seemed quiet and said very little.   
  
"Something's bothering you." Avalon stated matter-of-factly. Gold eyes flashing at him. Gods. He could stare into those eyes forever. He shifted nervously and looked away.  
  
"Just a rough ride here. That's all."   
  
Her eyes narrowed but she didn't say anything else. Desert was being served now and Remus munched on some more chocolate. This was going to be a long year. Dinner ended and Remus and the others headed up to the tower. Avalon walked along with them, encouraged by their humor and respect. The soft, warm glow of Gryffindor tower greeted them and seem to promise soft beds in the above rooms.  
  
Remus had to keep himself from running up to the dorm. He didn't want to seem rude, but he had to get away from Avalon as soon as he could. She broke away from the group and headed up towards the girls side. But before disappearing from view, she turned back to them.  
  
"Sweet dreams Remus," She smiled. "Try to get some sleep, you look like you need it."  
  
Suddenly the comfortable warmth of the tower seemed incredibly hot. Avalon disappeared into the upstairs and Remus felt a nudge in his side. Looking over, he finds James and others grinning at him.  
  
"Are you blushing?" asked James. Glancing to where Avalon had disappeared. "I don't know about you, but she doesn't seem entirely upset about what happened."  
  
Remus shot them all a glare and stamped up to their dorm. The three remaining boys stood there silently for a moment.  
  
"I'm not even sure he bit her," Sirius remarked softly. "He never said he actually did..."  
  
"I doubt he would remember something like that though," said James.  
  
"As much as I'd like to discuss this issue with you all," spoke Peter, glancing back towards the entryway. "But the first years are on their way up and I'd rather not meet them tonight. They're too grabby..."  
  
James and Sirius agreed and followed Remus' path upstairs.  
  
  
First day of classes and Remus was as nervous as a first year. Not about his actual classes though, but rather who his classmates would be. James, Peter, and Sirius teased him a little about Avalon before she joined them for breakfast. Remus choked down his food and excused himself as quickly as able.  
  
Athermancy was first and he couldn't complain. Compared to Divination, this class made sense. James joined him and commented that Sirius and Peter were together in Divination.  
  
"Oh, well I'm sure they have a morbid year ahead," remarked Remus.  
  
At that moment, Professor Vecter entered. No Avalon when class started. A good start. Hopefully it would stay that way. Defense Against the Dark Arts went by like a breeze, with he and Sirius cracking jokes.  
  
He didn't have a class after lunch, so Remus took the moment to relax. Arriving back at the tower though, he ran right into Avalon.  
  
"Oh! Sorry Remus," she bent down to pick up a few dropped items as Remus stood there like an idiot. "Love to chat, really, but I'm late for Potions. See you later!"  
  
Moving past the dumbstruck boy, Avalon left the tower. Remus Lupin felt like a fool.  
  
With a sigh, he made his way up to the dorm. Sighing even heavier, he practically dropped himself onto the bed. She was driving him insane and he'd only seen her twice today! But he didn't know how to respond. Part of him wanted to fall and weep at her feet, begging for forgiveness. The other part wanted to kiss her. Her eyes flashed in his mind and the sun reflected off her silver highlights. She was beautiful.  
  
Of course he had seen to scarring that beauty as well. Frowning, Remus threw a pillow over his face and let his thoughts wander. In two weeks, there would be another full moon; he could only hope that it disproves his nightmares.  
  
The bell for class change sounded too soon. Remus fumbled for his books and made his way tot he classroom. Advance Care for Magical Creatures. He hated the class. Any actual creatures that were brought in hated him because of his smell. Though he couldn't really blame them. Remus set his stuff on the desk and waited for class to start. His heart leapt into his throat. Gold eyes widen slightly in recognition.  
  
Oh gods no...  
  
"Hey Remus!" Avalon dropped her books next to his.  
  
"I thought you had Potions," inquired Remus.  
  
"Potions, yes, but not Double Potions," she replied. "I'm so advance in it, I only need to stay a normal class period."  
  
"Oh..."Remus grimaced inwardly. Not good.  
  
Class started with Professor Fillensnight explaining his intentions for more animal interaction in it. Remus blanched into his notes. This was going to be a rough year.   
  
"Are you feeling okay Remus?" asked Avalon. He just nodded and she frowned. "I admit, you look a little better the last night, but you still seem kinda pale." Avalon watched him with concern. "I'm sorry, it must be personal. I won't push."   
  
Remus was about to reply when they both received a sharp look from Fillensnight. After class, Remus collected his notes and frantically tried to find a way from Avalon.   
  
"Remus?"  
  
No luck.  
  
"This isn't your best class, is it? You didn't seem very comfortable in there."  
  
That's only half the reason...  
  
"It's my worse class," he replied.   
  
"Oh really? Aside from Potions, it's my favorite class." Avalon smiled, it was a beautiful smile, "If you need any help, just ask." She glanced down the hall, "Hey! There's Severus!"  
  
Remus twitched, "What?!"  
  
"Severus, over here!" she turned to Remus, "I'll see you guys later at supper. Sev and me agreed to work on our Potions homework together. Bye!" With that she ran off towards the Slytherin. Leaving Remus feeling rather shocked a bit jealous.  
  
Grudgingly, he made his way back to the tower. The Gryffindor common room was full of students talking excitedly about their first day. Over in the corner he spotted the 'Maraurders' and went to join them. Sirius and Peter were already working on an essay for divination, creating different demises for each other, with James giving some suggestions here and there.  
  
"Okay, how about this: Death by food fight at the Halloween Feast. Enchanted bat cookie attacks." Peter grinned and jotted the suggestion down. Remus joined the group and received an array of 'Hi's and 'Hello's.  
  
"Any suggestions from Moony?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Death by flashing gold eyes, piercing your very soul. Seeing all your secrets and knowing your every thought." Remus let his head thump against the table.  
Silence for a moment, then "So how was your day?"  
  
He shot them all a glare, "thanks for asking...I had Advance Care for Magical Creatures, which is bad enough as is. But Avalon was in there with me." He narrows his eyes, "then she runs off with Severus after class."  
  
Sirius looked like he could kill somebody right about then, "Severus? A Slytherin?" He cursed and started ranting about it. Peter looked bufuzzled and James was...laughing?  
  
Remus glared at him, "What's so funny?"  
  
"Maybe it's just me," James replied, between fits of laughter, "But you sound a bit jealous!"  
  
"I'm not jealous!"  
  
Sirius stopped ranting, paused and then started chuckling as well, "He's blushing again!"  
  
Remus knew he was from the distinct temperature change from comfortable to unbearable hot. "Drop it guys..."  
  
The laughter continued for a few more moments then finally subsided. They goofed around a bit more before going down to supper.  
  
"But still, Severus of all people..." Sirius continued on his ranting, "I feel betrayed!"  
  
"You're being dramatic," said James, "Severus isn't all that bad...it's the just the rest of Slytherin house..."  
  
Sirius glowered but said nothing. Of course they didn't like the Slytherin all that much, but he was gold compared to Lucious Malfoy. Speaking of the Devil, Lucious and his groupies were coming up from the dungeons just then.  
  
"Well, if it isn't the Gryffindor Four." Both groups glared at each other and Lucious spoke up again, "You may want to get out of everyone's way before they lose their appetites....I've already lost mine."  
  
"I'd think it was because you're always looking at your reflection, Lucious." Came a voice from behind Remus.  
  
Avalon had her hands on her hips with her eyes narrowed at Lucious. At least she didn't like all Slytherins. Remus had to admit to himself that she did look sexy when mad. She continued back down the steps, past Remus, James, Peter and Sirius and stopped right in front of Lucious.  
  
"Newsflash to Malfoy: You are not God's gift to women. Just a nuisance." It seemed like everyone in the hall was holding their breath; you could probably hear a pin drop. She certainly had a lot of guts, standing up to Lucious like that. And he obviously didn't like it one bit.  
  
"Speak for yourself." He retorted, sneering. "With such raged scars tearing across your face, who'd ever want you? Is there even a reason behind your retched appearance? Or is it just a birth mark?"  
  
Avalon just smiled as Remus immediately tensed up, "A werewolf attacked me."  
Lucious raised an eyebrow as James prodded Remus and nodded past the arrogant blond. Severus had joined the groupies and was staring right at them, and none to friendly either. Remus nearly jumped out of his skin when Lucious burst out laughing.  
  
"A werewolf?!" he mocked her. "What kind of story is that?!"  
  
"What is going on here?" Professor McGonagall, one of the younger teachers, appeared on the scene. "I suggest this ordeal end now or house points will be taken!"  
  
Immediately the crowd dispersed, but as Luscious passed them, he whispered, "This isn't over yet, Potter."  
  
Avalon fumed over supper but managed to calm down after about five glasses of pumpkin juice. Remus shot James a fierce look as he filled her cup up again. They somehow had managed to play 'switch seats around Remus so we can embarrass him' and he was now sitting next to her. She appeared to have calmed down some, to his great relief but before he could relax, she tensed up again and looked panicked.  
  
"I've made myself a target, haven't I?" Avalon's face showed nothing but worry now, "What was I thinking? Standing up to him like that?" She grabbed Remus' arm and leaned into him, "What if he comes after me or something?"  
  
Remus didn't know what to do. He wanted to comfort her, but how? Before he knew what he was doing, he disentangled himself from her grasp and had placed it around her shoulders. "Don't worry, he'll have to get through us first."  
  
The others nodded and he gave her an awkward hug before finishing up supper. He wouldn't let anyone hurt her now. He would make up for the pain and scars he caused her. Remus sighed, at least when the wolf wasn't in control. And in two weeks, he would know just how much he had cursed Avalon's life. He prayed that the curse hadn't spread.  
  
In two weeks. 


	2. A Beater of all Sorts

Disclaimer: Don't own chars you might actually recognize from the books. The plot is mine, if that's what you'd like to call it.  
  
Rating: Up'd it to R because of harsh language.  
  
A/N: Does anybody know Lilly's maiden name? I started to write a 'Miss -' part...but I didn't know her maiden name! Any idea? thanks  
  
Chapter 2  
  
A Beater of all Sorts  
  
  
  
Now I remember!" Exclaimed James. He received quite a few startled stares as the group walked down the hall to lunch. Lilly glanced worriedly at him and Remus raised an eyebrow.  
  
"What are you talking about?" inquired Remus. "Remember what?"  
  
"Well, you know we just had our first Quidditch practice, right?" Heads nodded and James continued, "At our first meeting, two of our players didn't show up. One was our old Beater from the past several years. I think he graduated though. Anyhow, do you remember Eve from last year?"  
  
"That stuck up snob?" Lilly narrowed her eyes. "What was her problem? Not enough fan boys crowded around to watch her practice?"  
  
James shook his head and Remus frowned, "She's in our year, but I haven't seen her at all this school year?"  
  
With another shake of his head, James continued, "But you have! Even I didn't realize it until a few moments ago, obviously. You'll never believe this but Av-"  
  
Lucious nearly ran them all over, running out of one of the classrooms. Behind him, a voice that could strike fear into the heart of dragon, shouted curses at him.  
  
"Damn it Malfoy! Give me my fucking wand back!" Lucious stopped in mid stride and turned back towards the classroom. He suddenly seemed very sure of himself, most likely because his two henchmen had appeared out of the crowds.   
  
He sneered and shouted back, "I don't have your stupid wand, Eve!"  
  
Charging out of the classroom came a very pissed off Avalon. Lucious had called her Eve though. And then Remus compared Avalon to what he remembered Eve looking like and realized that they were the same person. He was unlikely to get a chance to comment on it, though at the moment. A fight seemed inevitable.   
  
Avalon sent a fiery glare at Lucious, "Cut the crap, Malfoy, I saw you take it with my own two eyes. So give it back now or I'll-"  
  
"Or you'll what? You wouldn't dare touch me, even if you could." He narrowed his eyes and grinned evilly, "Pity you had to go running off in the woods and get all scarred up."  
  
A rather large crowd was forming in the hallway. Lupin briefly wondered why a teacher hadn't shown up yet. His focus remained on Avalon and Lucious though. Perhaps he should help her, but something held him back. A feeling...something...that insisted that she could take care of herself. And with the full moon being that night, he wasn't feeling particularly strong.  
  
Lucious continued, "Most would consider it an honor to marry into the Malfoy lineage. Plus, you would have been a rather entertaining spirit to break."  
  
Remus felt his inside tighten and his blood go cold. Marry? Into the Malfoy family? What was going on? Avalon seemed to actually be baring her teeth now. Lucious still had that evil sneer plastered on his face. Bastard. Lupin couldn't help but curse at the slicked-back hair boy.   
  
"My spirit cannot be broken. Now if you please," she forced out the word between gritted teeth, "give me my wand back."  
  
Lucious pulled a wand from his satchel and waved it in the air a bit, "You mean this wand? Hadn't realized I had it..." He glanced over at her, "How badly do you want it?"  
  
"Bad enough that I'll crush your face in to get it," threatened Avalon, who was now, to Remus' horror, acting more wolf-like then human. She was slightly crouched down, baring her teeth, and seemed to be growling.  
  
Lucious started to laugh. He didn't get much out past the first few chuckles though. She moved quicker then anyone could follow. But the distinct sound of a fist hitting flesh and bone cracking was unmistakable. Remus blinked and Malfoy was sprawled about seven feet from where he had been standing. Blood poured down his face, but he was still breathing. Pity.  
  
Avalon stood over him, glaring down as his pathetic figure, her wand grasped tightly in her fist. For a moment, the werewolf feared she might actually curse him. But then her composure completely changed. She was no longer the pissed off wolf-girl, ready to beat the hell out of everyone. Instead, a very scared and very shaken girl took her place.  
  
Horror dawned on her face and Avalon backed away slowly. "What have I done?" She barely whispered it out.   
  
Lupin wanted nothing more but to go and hold her and comfort her right there, but before he made then two steps, she was shoving through the crowd and running down the hallway, sobbing. He went to follow her, but a hand pulled on his arm. It was Lilly.  
  
"I'll go talk to her." She gave his arm a reassuring squeeze and followed the traumatized girl down the hallway.  
  
**********************  
  
Avalon rushed down the hallway and into the main hall. She glanced around nervously and then darted out the front doors and into the open air. Just behind her, Lilly stopped at the doors and watched the other girl slow to a stop outside while she caught her breath. Avalon took in a deep breath and then found a comfortable spot to sit next an old oak tree. Lilly gave her a few more moments of silence before making her way over to the tree and sitting down next to her.  
  
For a moment, there was an awkward silence and then Avalon looked at Lilly. It was then Lilly realized what Remus had meant by the girl's eyes being so intense. Golden eyes searing through her soul and making her feel like just a simple infant. Behind those eyes was a soul older then the world itself. She could feel herself falling away from reality, back into a world that she had left eons ago.  
  
Avalon looked away, glancing out across the lake and to Hogsmeade. When she finally looked back, the intensity seemed to be gone. The confusion was probably very clear on Lilly's face, as Avalon was now just staring at the dirt in front of her.  
  
"What am I?" Avalon's voice startled Lilly out of her confusion. She didn't speak though; the question seemed to be only the beginning to whatever Avalon wanted to get out.  
  
"I don't seem to know what or even who I am anymore. Back there in the hall...that wasn't me. Not that I haven't wanted to beat the snot out of Lucious, but I would never have done something like that." The girl frowned and traced nonsense paths into the dirt.   
  
Lilly was trying to figure that out as well. The boys had informed her, after her late arrival to Hogwarts due to her parents waking up late (eyes roll at the memory), that Remus was sure he had bitten Avalon. But was this a reaction of the full moon that coming night? Remus usually became weak and sick-like. But the girl next to her seemed completely the opposite. Violent and strong. That just didn't seem to add up.  
  
"Does he think he bit me?" Lilly looked at Avalon, wide-eyed. She couldn't read minds too, could she? The gold-eyes girl chuckled harshly. "By the expression on your face, you're thoughts were traveling the same path as mine. Remus panics too easily. He has let the world shape him into a hopeless soul who thinks he will never truly live."  
  
"How...how did you know it was him?" Lilly spoke up for the first time.   
  
"I recognized his smell," perplexed eyes watched her. "It sounds weird, I know. Let me assure you right now, though, he never bit me." She reached up and touched her face. "Just scarred me up pretty bad. Which I am actually extremely grateful for."  
  
Lilly didn't know where to start. She simply stated, "I have so many questions."  
  
"You're not the only one, but please, start wherever you'd like. Who knows, maybe if I tell you what I know, you will be able to figure some of it out. Or see something that I hadn't noticed before. But I suppose I should tell you the whole story and then we can go from there." Avalon let out another sour laugh; "I wonder why I'm even entrusting this story to you. I barely know you." She paused, "You smell right, I s'pose."  
  
Shrugging, Avalon began her story. "Nothing too important happened before this past summer, so I'll just start with the summer. My family owns a rather nice mansion back in some mountains. Not much there but lots and lots of forest. For the most part, I like spending my summers there. Most of the time I go off into the woods for hours, the entire day sometimes. Neither father nor mother approved but, and lets face it, I was spoiled rotten. At that point, I was still known as Eve"  
  
"My family is a lot like the Malfoy family. Not that bad I mean, but they have the same ideas like wizarding families not marrying any muggle born witch or wizard. The wanted to keep our bloodline 'pure'. So I shouldn't have been surprised when I discovered myself betrothed to Lucious. Yet I was. Boy was I furious. I've never liked Lucious, and my parents have never liked the Malfoy family. But if I was married into any other family, I might as well be marrying a cousin."  
  
Avalon sighed, "That's how Remus came to find me crying by a small pond. Now that I think about it, perhaps the only reason the wolf attacked me was because it was doing what nature had taught it to do, when hunting that is. Always go for the young, old, and the...dying. Lilly, I died that night. No. Eve died that night. Avalon was awakened and came into existence." Avalon went silent for a moment, and frowned. "Now that I think about it, though, that wasn't when these mood swings started. In fact...when was the first attack by that group of dark wizards? It was this past summer, wasn't it?"  
  
Lilly simply nodded, trying to follow the thought process here. What would those attacks have to do with anything? "Right after that first attack...I felt something change within me. I didn't really think about it until now. Honestly, though, I have no idea what started it. By attacking me, Remus must have fully awakened whatever was happening to me. After that attack, everyone tried whatever he or she could to rid me of these scars, but I didn't let them. I mean, I suddenly realized that this would be my way out of that marriage. I'm not quite sure how I stopped then; I just told my body that it was a good thing. After seeing my condition, the Malfoys blew off the entire plan and never spoke to my family again."  
  
"During that time between the attack and going back to school, I looked back and realized that girl who died that night was a horrible a person. I never wanted to have anything to do with her or her life again. I no longer wanted to be popular or beautiful. I just wanted to be me. I no longer cared what people thought of me, their opinions didn't matter. And yet..."  
  
"Not everything about Eve died?" suggested Lilly. She could see that quite clearly. After the fight and after the confrontation before supper, parts of Eve still dwelled in Avalon's soul.   
  
Avalon nodded, "That life is certainly gone. But I still have moments where I find myself being that proper little girl who never got in trouble but always had her way."  
  
"What about Quidditch?" inquired the Gryffindor.  
  
"Quidditch? What does that have to do with anything?" She quirked an eyebrow.  
  
"You were so good at it. Even now as I think about it, that seemed like the one thing you did for yourself just for the fun of it. Though I'm sure on the side you used it to your advantage in the popularity contest."  
  
Avalon was quiet for a moment and then answered quietly. "I loved Quidditch. I still do, in fact. But I feel it has too much to do with my old life to go back to. I have to admit though, I hated being the Seeker. That was definitely a part of Eve. If I ever actually go back to it, I'd rather be a Beater. Now that would be fun."  
  
Lilly grinned, "Then go and be a beater. James was just telling us that, aside from you, they had also lost a Beater this year. Coleman, I believe his last name was..."  
  
"Tat. That's what we called him. His real name was some odd French name his mother gave him." Avalon nodded, "He graduated last year. But that doesn't matter. As much as I would like to keep playing the game, I don't know if I can let myself."  
  
"Why not? You'd be in a different position plus, you would be playing purely for the fun of it. Not because you want people to see you or even for our house, but just to play."  
  
The girl was obviously beginning to feel better just talking about Quidditch. Avalon remembered the past years, playing the beloved game. The wind in her face and the fast pace action of catching the snitch while avoiding bludgers. The adrenaline pumping through her system. She then realized that she may not survive the year without that freedom to fall back too.  
  
"Tell James they'll have to find another Seeker," Avalon started. Lilly, thinking Avalon still wasn't going to play started to speak. The other girl grinned at her, "And let him know, also, that they won't need to worry about filling that Beater position."  
  
Lilly grinned, "Why don't you tell him yourself?"  
  
Avalon suddenly laughed and nodded towards the castle, "Because Professor Fillensnight is on his way over to pick me up for a long lecture, I'm sure."  
  
The Gryffindor girls looked at Hogwarts and watched Professor Fillensnight coming towards them. Avalon narrowed her eyes. "I don't like him."  
  
"Why?" asked Lilly, as she started to stand.  
  
"He doesn't smell right."  
  
They didn't say anything else as he drew near to them.  
  
"Miss McKay, please come with me. I'm sure you know what this has to deal with." Fillensnight looked at Lilly, "As for you, I suggest you return to your common room."  
  
The group made their way back towards the entrance and into the main hall. Before they parted ways though, Lilly grinned a reassuring smile and spoke, "If you happen to get bored during the lecture, just think about how sore Lucious is going to be for the next week."  
  
"That's a good idea. And if Remus just happens to see any other wolves about tonight, don't you worry about it. I like the wolf." Before Fillensnight could take any points from Lilly, she had run up the stairs and out of view, laughing the whole way.  
  
He sighed heavily and looked back Avalon, "Let's go then. All of us teachers are waiting to hear what you have to say of your actions today."  
  
Avalon nodded and then grinned broadly when he had turned his back. Just imagining Lucious in pain from her fist brightened her day drastically. Unless he had gotten a potion soon after the hit, he would have a bruise covering at least half his face. She would have to get a picture of that. 


	3. Bruises

Chapter 3  
  
Bruises  
  
  
Remus didn't see Avalon until his Advance Care of Magical Creatures class started. She didn't seem quite as upset as before, in fact, she seemed rather cheerful. She smiled at him and joined him at their shared table.  
  
"You look rather cheerful for having just been spending hours being lectured to by the teachers," commented Remus.  
  
Avalon suppressed a giggle, as Professor Fillensnight was starting class. She whispered back, "You should have seen Lucious' face! The bloke didn't get to a potion in time and is already turning black and blue!"  
  
Lupin smiled but didn't say anything else, noticing that Fillensnight was glaring at them. He watched them for a moment longer and then went on talking to the class.  
  
"After going over your first test and essays, I've concluded that you're ready to continue on to a more complicated category of creature. The Humanoids." His eyes traveled across the classroom and seemed to hesitate on Remus before continuing on, "This group consists of vampires, centaurs, werewolves, and a few others."  
  
Lupin's stomach was churning. Avalon seemed perfectly calm and more thoughts raced through his mind. Briefly he wondered if she hadn't been cursed or maybe she just didn't know it. But how couldn't she know? Over and over he speculated on the thoughts. Finally, he wearily let his head rest on the desk and sighed.  
  
"Is there a problem Mr. Lupin?" Inquired Fillensnight with only a hint of real concern.  
  
"I'll be fine, sir," lied Remus, "I just didn't sleep well last night."  
  
Fillensnight should know what the real problem is though, thought the teen, I'm sure Dumbledore informed all of the staff about my condition.  
  
Avalon looked at him, frowning but said nothing. Fillensnight didn't speak to either of them for the rest of the class. He went on lecturing about centaurs and their history with the Ministry of Magic. He even mentioned trying to have one of the centaurs from the forest to come by.  
  
"If you've any questions to ask of the centaurs," he commented, "who better to ask then a centaur?"  
  
By this point, Avalon was doodling little creatures across her notes that immediately began chewing on her letters. Remus was so weary; he didn't even smile at the doodles' antics.  
  
Professor Fillensnight continued to ignore them and gave out the homework assignment. "I want you each to read, in your books, over the chapter. I then want you to all write an essay about what you already know or believe about this subject and what you've learned so far. And it must be at least one meter in length."  
  
While all of the Gryffindors groaned at the mention of the essay, many of the Ravenclaws brightened up. The werewolf still noticed nothing; he merely stared down at his blurring notes, trying not to pass out or anything. Something caught his eyes and he focused back on his notes to see a white dog chewing on his words. Without a word, he slid the page over to a confused looking Avalon. Obviously the mutt had managed to move from her notes to his. She smiled and he went back to staring into space.  
  
Class was dismissed but before Remus had even stood up, Fillensnight called him up to his desk. Avalon smiled reassuringly at him and for a moment, he forgot all his worries. The professor didn't say anything until all of the other students had filed out of the classroom. At last he broke the growing silence.  
  
"I'm worried about you Remus," he actually spoke with real concern, "I know tonight is the full moon and that what your experiencing right now must be hard. It's really hard for me to see one of my students suffering from such hardships." He paused for a moment as though trying to phrase his next few words, "I have an old friend, he and I go a long ways back, and he specializes in curses and how they work. Would you have a problem if I sent him a letter inquiring about any information he may have about yours?"  
  
Remus didn't speak. He had no idea what to say. Someone who might be able to break his curse! Finally he sputtered out something along the lines of "Sure. That would be wonderful Professor!"  
  
Fillensnight grinned and dismissed the student.  
  
Remus quickly returned to the Gryffindor common room to tell the others. It seemed a bit more crowded then usual but as he caught bits and pieces of the conversations, he realized that they were all excited about the fight. He eventually made it over to his companions and sat down in the remaining empty chair.  
  
"Well, this has been an exciting day, hasn't it?" He glanced around but no one said anything and they all seemed rather glum. "What's wrong?"  
  
Lilly was the first to speak, "Avalon has trapped herself in the fireplace seats. Anyone who tries to go near her gets flames shot at him or her. She seems really upset about something."  
  
He frowned, "Well it must have happened after our class because she seemed as happy as can be when I last saw her."  
  
The brunette shrugged, "I don't know what else has happened since our first talk. She certainly won't talk to me now. Maybe you should give it try."  
  
"She seems to like you more then any of us," insisted Sirius with no hint of sarcasm.  
  
Remus sat in silence for a moment then slowly nodded. "I'll go and try to talk to her."  
  
He got up and made his way over to the fireplace and discovered it to be quite clear of students. The werewolf neared the fire and just made out Avalon's form on one of the two seats that were on either side of the fire.  
  
"Avalon?" he called out her name softly, wondering if she could hear him over the roar of the fire.  
  
His question was answered immediately by a shot of flame coming right at him. Logic at the moment assessed that every part of him should be screaming to move. But he didn't. Instead, all he felt was a calm wave flow over him as the fire reached out towards his body. Remus braced himself for the heat but only received a hot blast of air. The flame was an illusion?  
  
He pushed through the illusion and sat down next to a very upset Avalon. She frowned at her failed ploy to be alone and then broke down in tears. Remus wondered briefly what could have happened so quickly to make her attitude change so drastically. The lycanthrope said nothing though. In one swift move, he pulled her close to him and held her gently.As he held her, he began to realize that her sobs were not out of sadness but out of shear anger. Remus could feel it radiating off her.  
  
"Avalon," he began, "What happened?"  
  
Her sobs quickly subsided and she clenched her fists. "Might I repeat what I said earlier, Lucious is an absolute bastard. After class, I went to meet with Sev for our Potions study and...Remus, he had been beat up really bad. I had reached out to grab his hand because I didn't think he had heard me calling. He jerked his hand away like my touch was acid."  
  
Remus couldn't feel much pity for the Slytherin. How could this have made her so mad? She clearly wasn't finished yet.  
  
"I'm pretty sure I know why, too." Her eyes narrowed, "You know that Severus was the only one to stand up for me when the teachers were trying to find witnesses that would speak freely and truthfully about what happened. Both Malfoy and I were there when he spoke. After his testimony, both of us had 50 points deducted and received detentions. Before, I would have been the only one punished."  
  
Avalon went silent and Remus finished it, "So Lucious wasn't too happy and had Crabbe and Goyle teach him a lesson in loyalties." Now Remus had to pity Severus. The Slytherin had risked a lot by doing that.  
  
"He doesn't want anything to do with me now because he's afraid of Lucious. Yet he really needs a friend right now. I'm not sure why but I just have this bad feeling. I fear that he will live out his life in a lie and become some wretched man that all loath."  
  
They both sat in silence for a while, watching the fire crackle and slowly die. Remus didn't realize how much time had passed until James tapped him softly on the shoulder. Neither said anything but the message was clear. He glanced down at Avalon and discovered her sleeping form leaning into him.  
  
"Avalon?" Remus spoke softly and she slowly opened her eyes and sat up.  
  
"What time is it?" she asked.  
  
"Time for supper," answered James.  
  
They both got up and met the others in the center of the common room. Remus knew he couldn't go down with them, as much as he wanted too though. It was too close to dusk, the moon would be up soon.  
  
"Go on with them Avalon, I'm not feeling too well." Avalon nodded and squeezed his hand (which he hadn't realized she was holding).  
  
"Okay, you go rest and get better, " She caught up with Lilly who was already going out the portal.  
  
Remus nodded to the Maraurders as they left. The werewolf waited for the room to clear out so he could go and answer the moon's call. 


	4. Can't Fight the Moonlight

Antares: Thank you again for that delightful critique. It's nice to get reviews from different people.

A/N: I do encourage people to critique me, how else am I to better my writing? Enjoy! Speaking of critiques…the last part of this chapter was proofread or anything, so it may be a bit rough. Gomen na sai, more then likely I'll re-upload it later with corrections. And do let me know if my little HTML experimenting is any good…I'm not too sure really

Disclaimer: I wonder if I just have one in the first chapter if it counts for all the story…anyhow, don't own any of J.K. Rowling's creations, but the McKay family is mine! Can't Fight the Moonlight is a title of some random song that they play too much at work. Honestly, I think Celine Dion sings it, but I assure you it isn't mine.

* * *

Chapter Four

Can't Fight the Moonlight

* * *

Avalon didn't say much during supper. But she and Lilly occasionally shared whispers back and forth. A wave of snickers flowed across the room as Lucious entered; a black and blue bruise covered most of his face. A few pats and encouraging remarks reached Avalon; she responded with a grin.

Supper was uneventful otherwise and soon the tired students returned to their rooms. Peter and Sirius were re-enacting the fight and behind them, Lilly and James were walking hand-in-hand. Behind the group, Avalon walked slowly, deep in thought. The full moon poured into the hallway and as she entered the pool of light, she stopped. The group continued on before realizing she was no longer with them.

"Avalon?" James turned and watched her, "Are you alright?"

She stood there, motionless, staring at the moon. No one said anything but remained silent, watching her. The raven-haired girl pulled her eyes away from the white light and seemed to force herself to start walking again. Her eyes seemed unfocused as she passed them and slowly went up the stairs. They all exchanged confused looks and followed after her. Lilly rushed ahead of them and caught up with Avalon first.

"What happened back there?" she asked.

Avalon furrowed her eyebrows, "The moon was calling me."

Lilly shook her head, "What do you mean? I thought you said Remus didn't bite you."

"He didn't, but-" Avalon looked down at her hands. "I want to run through the forest, feel the earth beneath my hands."

Lilly watched Avalon's face as her eyes remained unfocused. A battle was taking place and she briefly wondered if this was how Remus struggled too. A sharp gasp brought Lilly back to the present. Avalon was shaking now and, to Lilly's horror, her hands were starting to change.

Voices from down the stairs warned the girl that the boys were coming up. She grabbed Avalon's hands and held them tightly.

"Avalon. Listen to me. You can't change here. Tell the wolf that it can run as much as it likes but not yet." Lilly continued holding the hands firmly, "Look at me. Not yet. Come with me back the tower and wait until everyone has gone to bed. Then go to Remus, let the wolf run then."

Avalon took in a deep, shaky breath and exhaled slowly, "I'm okay now…"

Lilly let go of her hands, relieved to see that they were normal once more. The boys had reached them and were watching Avalon with concerned looks.

"What's going on Lilly?" asked James, clearly bewildered. "Avalon?"

"Nothing for you all to worry about," replied Avalon.

"And yet I still do," retorted James, "We all do."

Avalon's expression softened and she smiled. "It's good to know I have such caring friends. Really though, I'll be fine now." With that, she turned and continued up the stairs to Gryffindor Tower.

Lilly gave them a pleading look not to pursue the issue any further. They didn't and silently followed her upstairs. Afterwards, their conversations consisted mostly of classes and Quidditch. As for Avalon, she claimed a large, soft chair near the fire and became immersed in a book. A few hours later, she pulled her eyes away from the pages and noticed the waning embers of the fire. The common room was empty.

Moments later, a book lay open on an empty chair. A dark figure pulled a cloak tighter around her body and moved out into the dark hallways.

Remus lapped at the cool water. He would have been at the shack but there were students in his path and he couldn't fight the moon much longer. Now the werewolf was deep inside the Forbidden forest but it wasn't the first time he had been here and more then likely it wouldn't be the last. The wolf sniffed the air, searching for signs of prey. Nothing reached his sensitive nose though.

The night was cool but he didn't feel it. For the wolf it was warm still. The pale moon flooded the forest in pools of light. The sorrowful moon. Remus looked up at it and howled long and mournfully. So many nights before, silence would follow his cry and Remus found himself feeling even more alone.

This time, however, his howl was answered. The wolf's ears perked forward, searching for the source of the reply. He whined softly, almost as though urging the other to cry out once more. He wanted to find the new companion. Only the normal night sounds of crickets and other nocturnal creatures filled the darkness ensued. The wolf continued listening, swiveling his ears in every direction.

He heard nothing more and loneliness set in once again. The werewolf looked down at the undisturbed pond; a dark, gray wolf looked back at him, eyes unmoving. He closed his eyes and sighed inwardly as the wolf pushed them to their feet. The hunter was hungry and was eager to find fresh meat.

White flashed past him and the wolf jumped to the side. Baring his teeth and growling fiercely at the intruding creature, he pressed his body low to the ground. Fur bristled and the he glared at the intruding white creature. A white wolf was sitting casually across the clearing from him. Panting slightly, it almost seemed as though she were laughing at him. The wolf relaxed slightly, but didn't drop his guard yet. Remus wondered if that was a shrug she made before getting up and approaching the pond.

Remus scooted away from her as she passed him again. He cautiously watched her as she bent down to drink from the pond. The gray wolf started to drop his guard a little more. The white wolf shook her body and stretched, ending the stretch with a wide yawn. He tensed slightly once more when she turned to face him and jumped when she let out an estranged bark that sounded like she was attempting to howl at the same time. She dropped her shoulder and head towards the ground and waved her tail in the air.

All caution was thrown to the wind. The wolf realized right away that the she-wolf wanted to play, not fight! Then they were running, playing a makeshift game of tag. For the first time in his life, Remus didn't struggled to control the wolf. For the first time in his life, he wanted to run with the wolf, to feel the dirt beneath his paws. The wolf and Remus became one mind and there was no struggle for control.

Hours passed, and yet the wolves seemed to not tire from their ongoing game. Yet even magical creatures like the werewolf tire eventually. Remus laid across the cool ground, tongue lolling as he struggled to catch his breath. White did the same across from him, sending him a wolf-grin. He looked up to the sky and noted that dawn would soon be upon them. Finally he would know the identity of the white wolf.

Remus swatted the thought away. He wasn't sure where it came from, but the back of his mind had been wondering from the start just who this white wolf was. Everything inside his mind screamed 'Avalon' but this wolf seemed like this wasn't her first transformation. The mysterious wolf yawned and slowly stretched, her posture taking on a relaxed form. Sleep was coming upon both of them quickly, but the werewolf's mind couldn't stop wondering about it all. Darkness enveloped them and sleep quieted his mind.

The Gryffindor stirred in his sleep and his pale back warmed under the rising sun. With a groan, he attempted to push away a sharp rock that was nearly impaling him in the side. Realizing the rock was refusing to move, the light brown hair boy slowly turned over and shielded his eyes from the increasing light. He was human again, and in a flash, the night's events returned to him. Immediately he was wide-awake and was sitting up, looking for the other werewolf. He discovered himself alone though; his new companion was gone. To his surprise, a pile of clean, un-shredded clothing laid nearby. The nude boy welcomed the cover as it was always hard to getting back to his dorm when he had little to no clothing left after a transformation.

He pulled on the clothing and made his way back up to the castle. Remus was constantly on the look out for signs of the white wolf, but to no avail. The forest grew thick as he moved out of the meadow. Whatever warmth he had gained from the sun was now lost the dark shade, but the werewolf didn't notice too much. Perhaps the wolf had actually been just a normal wolf and not a 'were' as he had assumed. He found the thought to be a bit of a stretch though, as he remembered the intelligence he saw in those eyes. Remus just had to wonder now who she was and gave every reason why it wouldn't have been Avalon.

By the time Remus had reached the common room, most everyone was down at breakfast. He quickly threw on a clean-smelling uniform and rushed down to breakfast. He slowed his-self a bit before entering the great hall; he didn't want to appear in a rush. Yet he couldn't help but feel a little excited about the turn of events. Grinning faces greeted him at the Gryffindor table. Returning his own grin, the pale boy took his regular seat.

"Are you feeling any better today Moony?" inquired Sirius while also trying to chug some orange juice.

When Remus didn't reply, Sirius put the cup down and looked over at his friend. "Remus? Are you alright?"

Remus was looking at the empty seat next to him. "Where's Avalon? Is she alright?" He looked up at Sirius.

Sirius ran a hand through his dark, in which he was determined to grow out now, and shrugged. "Haven't seen her since last night…"

Just as Remus was really about to start worrying, he felt a warm presence joining him on the bench. Turning back around, he was about to greet Avalon with a warm smile, but found himself frowning instead. She looked really pale and tired. 

"Avalon? What happened? You look…" He didn't want to say 'awful', it sounded rather rude, but what else could he say?

She picked her head up from the empty plate and looked at him, "Like crap, I know…I don't feel much better either. It must have been something I ate last night." She grimaced. "I think there was fish in that…I'm not sure what it was, last night. I can't eat fish. 'M not allergic or anything, the stuff just doesn't agree with me."

Avalon rubbed her face with her hands, "By the time I realized what was wrong and got to Madam Kalt, half the night was already gone. I somehow manage to keep that potion down that she gave me, but I wasn't able to get much sleep afterwards."

"If you're feeling that horrible, why did you even come down to breakfast?" asked James, now joining the conversation.

She raised her eyebrows and gave a small grin, "After spending the night vomiting my guts out, I've found myself rather famished." She paused and watched as everyone glanced awkwardly at each other. "And now that I've thoroughly disgusted all of you, would someone please pass the eggs and bacon?"

Breakfast continued on, though somewhat subdued after the unnecessary details. Remus caught a few curious glances towards him from the other three boys. He couldn't blame them really; usually the day (and sometimes the next) after the full moon, he would be up in the infirmary regaining his energy. He wondered momentarily if perhaps, when he accepted the wolf's presence last night, he saved more of his energy. Before he could muse on the idea any longer, though, Lilly pulled all of their attention to an article in the Daily Prophet.

"It says here that there was another attack on the muggles by that group of dark wizards that's been running about, causing trouble…

At around midnight Tuesday night (last night), a group of muggles traveling home from a gathering of sorts, were attacked by a handful of dark wizards. Three of the muggles were killed before the Ministry of Magic arrived on the scene. The dark wizards proved to be powerful and deadly as the Ministry suffered its own casualties. Romulus McKay, a renowned wizard in the field of defensive magic, was lost in the battle while helping one of the wounded muggles."

Lilly continued on, but with a weaker voice. No one said anything as she finished the article. Remus turned and looked at Avalon. Her face was expressionless, not even a hint of shock or sadness. Or maybe this was shock. He softly took her hands and squeezed it gently.

"Romulus McKay, my father. He didn't like muggles; would often complain about them and their strange ways. But he was very compassionate about helping others. He wasn't necessarily nice, but he rarely turned his back on those who needed aid. Looks like maybe he wrong this time and should have kept his back turned on those who couldn't kill him with a single word." Her voice sounded strained, as though holding back anger rather then sorrow.

"Avalon…" Remus wanted to say something comforting but she didn't want that right now. Jerking her hand away, she promptly stood up to leave.

"I'm fine. Now if you'll please excuse me," the words were sharp off her tongue as she headed out of the hall.

Avalon felt numb to the world. She didn't feel anything and wondered why that was so. Logic insisted she should be crying and weeping, but she wasn't. Just past the main doors, a gentle hand touched her shoulder.

"At last Avalon reveals herself through the mists," the Headmaster smiled warmly at her, yet his eyes were gravely serious.

"Headmaster…I…" Professor Dumbledore hushed her and motioned for her to follow him.

Neither said anything until reaching the entryway to the Headmaster's office, "Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake." Avalon raised an eyebrow but remained silent as they traveled up the tall staircase. "I'm so sorry we were unable to find you last night to inform you of this tragedy, Ms. McKay. It grieves me that you should find out this way and one can only hope that you will not lose that glow of life that constantly surrounds you."

"Life cannot be lost, Professor, only stolen or passed on to others. It is endlessly spinning in circles, rejuvenating itself." Albus looked at the girl as they entered into his warm office. The wisdom she spoke was beyond her time but as he studied her, it almost appeared as if she said nothing. Yet clearly there was more to her then maybe either of them realized.


	5. The White Flame

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. 'Cept for Avalon and her family.

Author's Note: Please, let me know what you think needs to be worked on, what my week points are. This story is for fun, but its also a bit of practice for my writing skills. On an extremely different note, I have no clue who I'm going to pair Avalon with. Maybe I should take a vote…

**Chapter 5**

**The White Flame**

A warm fire glowed in the stone hearth. Dumbledore set himself in one of the large chairs before the fire and gestured for Avalon to join him. Without a sound, she sank into the immense chair and stared into the fire. Across from her, Albus summoned two cups of hot cocoa. She accepted the drink and fleetingly pondered if his cure for everything was sweets. Avalon welcomed the warm drink, though, as it wet her parched mouth and soothed her tightening throat. 

Still no one spoke, though the silence wasn't uncomfortable, rather, it was calming. The cocoa never seemed to cool despite the amount of time Avalon was sure had passed. Eventually, she sets the cup down on the coffee table next to her, feeling the need to say something—anything—but stopped short. On the table laid an old, tattered book with uneven pages jutting out the sides and gold covering the corners of the hardback.

Avalon picked up the book and her eyes widened as she realized what was on the cover. The face of a white wolf peered up at her and it yawned, appearing to be very bored and impatient. The Headmaster watched her with curious eyes, wondering if she would accept what the book offered. The Gryffindor abruptly looked very uncomfortable and set the book back on the table. With a protesting whine, the book fell into, what appeared to be, a forced sleep. 

"There is a magic in this world more ancient then the first wizard's charm," began Dumbledore, sighing heavily as the book locked itself. "The Creator of all placed upon our world two powerful entities. Their energy and power were constantly fluctuating yet remaining balanced. Any extra amount of energy would overflow into the world and form as magic. But too much power is like too much water flowing through thin pipes, they become corrupted and start to deteriorate."

The Headmaster paused, taking a sip from his drink. Avalon was staring into the fire when she spoke up. To his surprise, she continued the story, "It was the battle of Life and Death," a slight shrug. "Something that has yet to end. Death wanted more power so he gave abilities to his most loyal followers and commanded them to steal away Life's own minions. The balance began to tilt and in turn, Life created her own champions. A large battle ensued and the Creator had to intervene to keep the world from being destroyed.

"They were both punished and banished: Death banished to a prison far beneath the surface and Life to the skies above. The story goes that they still have small battles here and there. Small battles in preparation for their final war perhaps." Avalon ended with a slight frown, "At least that's what I've heard. I can't remember who told me, though. It might have been my nursemaid."

The wizened man couldn't help but think differently, yet before he could inquire further, there was a soft knock at the door.

"Enter," answered Dumbledore and a young woman stepped in, "Ah! Professor McGonagall! I'm pleased you could make it."

The young teacher nodded and smiled softly at Avalon, "How are you, dear?"

Avalon managed a half-smile, "I've been better."

"As I'd have imagined," McGonagall shook her head and looked back to Dumbledore. "Mrs. McKay has suggested that Avalon should return home for some time."

"Of course she did," Albus glanced over to the quiet girl, "But we shall leave that decision up to Avalon."

At the mention of her name, Avalon looked to each of their faces and then dropped her gaze to the floor. "If it isn't a problem, I'd like to go…" she lifted her head again, her eyes reflecting unshed tears, "But only for a short while. I'd like to be back by tomorrow evening, if its possible."

Albus nodded and stood, moving behind his desk. "Very well, Minerva? If you would please prepare for Ms. McKay's departure, I'll send a message to her professors."

The Gryffindor rose from her seat then and headed for the door, "Thank you, I'll go and gather some things."

"Avalon?" the girl stopped as Professor McGonagall called her name, "Will you be alright? To stay only for a short time?"

"I'll be fine." She stated matter-of-factly and left the room before any further objections.

"Is there anything else we can do for her, Albus?" inquired Minerva.

"We have done what we can, Minerva. It may be up to her friends now to remind her to live." Albus replied sullenly.

Severus pushed himself further into the shadows, trying to blend and not be seen. Potter dashed by him, too focused on his companions to notice the Slytherin. Severus Snape had been hoping for a chance to catch Avalon alone to apologies and give her his sympathies. But the Gryffindor four were around her non-stop while she prepared to leave. Even now in the Great Hall, the small crowd surrounded her.

"Here are these Quidditch plans for you to look over if you want to get your mind off things," James handed her some rolls of parchment. "You're welcome to join us for practice if you're back in time. Our first game is this weekend."

Avalon smiled and took the rolls, "Thanks, I'll try to make it to practice."

"You don't have to push yourself, you know that." Spoke up Remus, looking very concerned.

She just smiled more broadly at him, "Really, I'll be fine guys." The dark-hair girl chuckled softly, "Now you all should probably be getting to class before you're too late."

Peter rolled his eyes, "You don't think that we could get the day off too? Do you?"

Sirius dug his elbow into Peter's side, "That was rather rude! Apologize you bloke!"

The girl's eyes lit up a bit as she tried to put a tone of seriousness in her voice, "Its okay…please, I need to go now. I'll see you tomorrow."

About that time, Professor McGonagall came down the steps with Lilly behind her.

"…As I mentioned before, Miss Evans," her voice trailed down to them, "They're bound to be all already gathered down here." The teacher reached them and greeted them with a warm smile. "As for you lot, I suggest you get on to class before you find yourselves in detention."

The four boys groaned and forced themselves to start towards their classes. Lilly rushed up to Avalon with a quick hug and then urged the other Gryffindors to hurry. Avalon watched them go, her smile fading away, and then turned to the professor, "I suppose I'm ready now…"

Professor McGonagall nodded, "Very well, if you'll follow me…"

They both turned and exited the castle, leaving Severus feeling a bit bothered at not being able to speak with Avalon. He should probably be getting on to his own classes then, he mused. Yet, as he left the comfort of the shadows, someone gripped his arm firmly, stopping him.

"Don't think I didn't see you hiding there in the shadows!" Severus turned, wide-eyed, to find Avalon smiling at him. His heart seemed to stop in his chest; her eyes were so sad. "I told McGonagall that I forgot something and ran back inside to find you."

"Avalon…" Severus Snape never before felt such a loss of words. "How did you--"

"See you? Because you don't belong in the shadows, Sev." The girl released her grip, and let her body slouch a little. Her smile had faded again. "Why did you stand up for me? You knew what Lucious would do to you if you took my side!"

Severus' gaze fell from her face and down to the floor, "I usually wouldn't care what he did to others. I'd ignore it just like everything else he does. But when you fought back at him…no one ever fights back. You did, though…and I had to respect you for that." He looked up at her again. "I have to apologize for the way I acted afterwards. I was never angry with you…I was just angry with myself for letting him do that to me. That I couldn't be…couldn't be strong like you."

Avalon shifted her weight to the side and watched him with worry. After a hesitant moment of silence, she took his hand between her two and held if firmly. "You have your own strength as well, Sev. You just haven't found it yet. The moment will come, soon or maybe years from now, but you will be able to fight back at Lucious. It may not be physical strength, it may be something else." She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, "And don't apologize…there's nothing to be sorry for."

Severus almost protested aloud when she freed his hand from her grasp. "I need to go now. I'll be back sometime tomorrow…"

"Avalon." The Slytherin found the name sliding across his lips as though it were honey. "Please, if there's anything I can do for you…"

The raven-hair girl replied with a half smile, "You're a good friend, Sev. Don't ever change."

Then she was gone again with Severus finding himself at a loss. Contemplating the past few moment's events and departing for class, the pale boy failed to notice the pair of eyes watching him from up the stairs. Peter Pettigrew stood from where he had been retrieving his dropped wand. With suspicion bright in his eyes, he watched as the Slytherin left the large hall and entered down into another.

The others would certainly be intrigued by this change of events. More then likely, Remus may even become a bit surprised by the idea of competition. With a burst of energy, Peter dashed down the hallway after his friends.

The air was warm and the humidity caused Avalon's robes to stick to her. The girl gazed around at her surroundings, trying to figure out what had happened. She had returned home to her family, seeking out the comfort she needed for and from her family. The house elves, out of their own grief, created an enormous amount of savory meats and vegetables. There was doubt that anyone actually tasted the food; dinner had been almost unbearable with the long silences in between a word or two of babble.

Avalon finally managed her way up to her room, closing the door and sealing up a sense of security. She had been preparing for bed when she suddenly found herself fully dressed in her school uniform and no longer in her room. Or even her house for that matter.

The Gryffindor gazed around once again, thinking of what this place could be. It appeared to be a park and not a very large or impressive one either. A full moon gazed down at her, filling her surroundings with light. __

But the full moon was last night… 

Voices to her right startled her into jumping and whirling around to find the source. Coming down the path was a group of young muggles, talking boisterously and full of energy. Avalon hurried to move out of sight, not wanting anyone to see her in the wizard robes. The group passed, oblivious of the magical girl within feet of them. 

"Crucio!" 

Avalon's heart stopped. Hundreds of questions raced through her mind. An Unforgivable Curse! Who used it? Why are they attacking the muggle? Where are they?!

Her eyes darted back and forth across the clearing as the group gathered around their fallen companion. Their shouts of panic did nothing to calm Avalon. Another Crucio was called out and this time the girl could see where the curse was coming from. Almost directly across from her, she could just barely make out three or four figures. A moment later, three of the muggles lay twitching and writhing in pain as the curse tore away at them. 

"Stupefy!" A deep, strong voice called out and one of the dark figures appeared to go limp and fall over. Avalon jerked her head to the left at the sound of the voice. A tall, well-built man entered the clearing and she gasped as the moonlight hit his face.

"Dad? Dad!" She called out to him but it seemed to be vain, as he did not hear her.

Then all Hell broke loose. The muggles continued crying out in terror at the unknown. The dark figures across the clearing moved out away from each other, but remained in the shadows. Curses and counter-curses, charms and body-binding spell flew back and forth throughout the clearing. Avalon could see now that her father wasn't alone and she silently cheered him on. The past day vanished from her mind, the newspaper was no more and the silent dinner didn't happen. This was the present, real-time battle. Her father would live, she just knew it!

One of the muggles fell while trying to flee and curled up in a fetal position when another dark figure approached her. The shadow raised his wand, to kill at least one more innocent, his pale arm showing in the silver light, as his robe had been ripped away.

"No!" Avalon wasn't sure if had been her voice or her father's that protested, but in a flash, her father was between the darkness and the muggle. The force of the curse sent his body somersaulting through the air. Other's that had been with Romulus lifted their own wands to stop the shadowed figure but in the blink of an eye, it was gone. He had apparated himself away from the battle.

Avalon was at her father's side at once. She shuddered at the sound he made as he tried to breathe: a tight, rasping sound that signified a great deal of damage to his trachea. 

"Father?" Her voice wavered. His eyes were unfocused, staring up at nothing. His breathing was becoming more of a struggle. "Father, please don't leave me!"

His eyes remained unfocused but he reached up a hand towards her, "Avalon…" His voice was barely even a whisper. "You will…always be my beautiful…little girl."

She reached out to take his hand but, to her horror, her hands passed through his. With pain and sorrow tightening her own throat, she tried again and again but she could not touch him. His body became more relaxed now and he exhaled deeply and without signs of trouble. Second ticked by, but he did not inhale again. Avalon choked back a sob and stood up, backing away from the body. A cold rush of wind swept across her as the other wizards darted past her and _through_ her. She held up one hand to her face, horror striking her heart. 

No one could see her! No one could feel or hear her! Avalon was on the verge of breaking out in a run when her eyes caught sight of a white flame, burning up in a nearby tree. The flame turned its head to look her and Avalon realized, despite the growing numbness, that the creature was a white Phoenix.

The next moment, she was standing in front of the mirror, her reflection asking if she was feeling well. She slowly turned around and the realization finally sunk in that she was back home, in her bathroom. The park was gone, she could no longer hear the muggles horrified cries, and her father's body wasn't in sight. Sleep did not come easily to her that night.


	6. The Hierarchy of Things

Disclaimer: Me no own...if I did, I'd have money and wouldn't be writing stuff like this for fun...wait...oh n/m

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**Chapter 6**

**The Hierarchy of Things**

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"I don't understand why you're protesting now, James," Eleanor quirked an eyebrow at the other chaser. "Even back when Eve...Avalon...whatever her name is now, was 'team captain,'" she flexed her fingers like quotation marks, "you were the one who made all the plans and moves. She didn't need to worry about that, being the Seeker and all."

James opened his moth to protest further, but was cut off by Sirius, a Gryffindor beater. "And another can of acid worms is opened up. Avalon is taking up the beater position, which is fine by me (especially after seeing Luscious' little souvenir), but she doesn't have any real team experience. She won't have the first clue how to execute any of our plays."

"Isn't that what practice is for?" Avalon stepped from the shadow of the doorway.

"How long have you been-"

"Oh, and James should go ahead be captain," commented the tall girl, cutting James off in mid-sentence.

"Obviously long enough," Sirius answered James' unfinished question.

"Well, that settles it then," Eleanor grabbed her broom while smirking at James, "come on captain, tell us the plan!"

He sighed heavily, with a hint of sarcasm, finally giving in. "Right, Sirius, fill Avalon in on her new beater duties. And Avalon? I need you to also inform Ian about his seeker duties."

The girl nodded, glancing over at the new seeker. It was going to be a long evening, but Avalon welcomed the distraction. That was the nice thing about Quidditch: there was no room to think, just react. She wouldn't have to worry about her mind wandering tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"No! Avalon!" James slid two hands through his hair and let a long and frustrated sigh. "Wait for Sirius' signal before knocking the blugder away."

She bit back an excuse and looked away sheepishly. They had already tried this play several times and she had yet to get it right. James took a long breath, "You aren't the star of the show anymore. You're part of the team now and you must remain aware of Sirius' moves. The same goes for Sirius. Be aware of each other and make sure none of us get pummeled."

Avalon nodded, "I never realized it'd be so hard to break old habits."

"Well, they better be broken by Saturday." James glanced up at the sky. The sun had just set and only a bit of light remained, "It's too dark to do anything more tonight. Hufflepuff has the field again in the morning, so we'll meet tomorrow night."

The team grounded their brooms and headed to the changing rooms. Avalon peeled off her sweaty clothes and jumped into the shower for a quick wash; Eleanor took the stall next to her.

"Hey Eve!" Avalon grimaced as the other quickly corrected herself, "I mean, Avalon. I hear you're going steady with a particular Slytherin."

The short-haired girl chocked and sputtered, "What?!"

"Oh, don't deny it. Severus is rather cute - for a Slytherin. That is kind weird though, you just seem the type to go for someone-"

"Where the hell did you hear that?!" Avalon was at the front of her stall, glaring at the other nude girl.

Eleanor shrieked and tried to cover herself, " Do you mind?!"

Avalon rolled her eyes, "Oh please, its not like you have anything I've never seen! Now tell me where you heard that!"

The other Gryffindor shrank back, "Its just a rumor going around!"

Amber eyes narrowed, "Guess no one bothered to think about how damaging 'just a rumor' can be...who did you hear it from?"

After a moment of fidgeting, Eleanor replied, "I heard it from a group of 5th years while going to class this morning. They mentioned something about some scrawny, 7th year boy talking to his friends about seeing you two together." 

Avalon frowned and placed one hand on her hip while grinding her teeth, "I'm going to kill him..."

"Great, as long as it isn't me. Now can you please give me some privacy? I've told you what you wanted to know!"

Fuming, Avalon left the other girl alone and quickly finished showering. Throwing her school uniform on, she was half running back up to the castle. Supper had already started as she stormed into the Great Hall. Heads turned towards her as the doors swung open. Avalon took in her surroundings and quickly concluded that nearly the entire student body had heard the gossip.

Some were smiling and giggling, while others looked a bit mad and betrayed (namely, Gryffindors). A glance to the Slytherin table told that Severus had locked himself in a room somewhere. Her steps did not falter as she took in the information. Her target destination: a particular group of boys. Sirius jabbed an oblivious Peter in the side and the boy jerked his head around. All color drained from his face and he tried to hide behind Sirius. Remus stabbed at his food numbly while James looked at Lilly, pretending to be talking to her and ignoring the situation.

Professor McGonagal was on her feet in an instant, meaning to intercept Avalon. Dumbledore held up his hand to stop her, "Don't worry, Minerva, she won't be hurting anyone tonight. Do sit down and relax."

"But Albus, last time she..." she sat down hesitantly.

"I am well aware that her intentions are hard to read...but watch." As he spoke, McGonagal surveyed the disaster waiting to happen.

To her amazement, though, as Peter shrank away and shielded himself with his hands, Avalon seemed to calm substantially. Bewildered, Peter slowly dropped his hands, as the girl took her seat next to Remus and began to serve herself dinner.

Avalon chewed on her chicken mercilessly and washed it down with a sweet tasting punch. No one said anything, preferring she took out her frustration on the meat, rather then one of them. Remus glanced over at her and fought back the urge to try and comfort her.

"Where the Hell did you get an idea like that?!" Everyone jumped at the sharpness in her voice.

Peter chocked on a carrot, "I...I saw you with the Slytherin-"

"Severus"

"Um...yeah...yesterday before you left, I saw you two in the hall..."

"So you told everyone we were in some kind of relationship?"

"No! Not really, I told James and the guys what I saw, but that was all! Honest!"

"He did tell us-in the COMMON room," interjected James, finding the courage to enter the conversation.

At this point, Remus expected Avalon to hit Peter with another burst of angry words. Yet, instead, she drooped and sighed with a weariness that made even him feel tired.

"Well, thanks a lot. Appreciate your concern for my well-being." She stood up, her food hardly touched. "I'm going to bed now, I've had a long day."

Peter opened his mouth, then closed it, deciding that he'd stay quiet this time. No one else said anything either. Remus stared back down at his food; more then likely it was cold by now. That's what he felt like most of the day.

His insides had gone cold last evening when Peter proudly revealed his estranged information. Other emotions flashed through him and left him feeling overwhelmed and numb. Remus sighed heavily and started to stab his food absentmindedly once more.

Lilly whispered something to James and he leaned over to the werewolf. "Maybe you should go talk to her."

Remus looked up at him, furrowing his eyebrows. Lilly smiled at him and gestured at Avalon's untouched food. "She probably hasn't eaten very much in the past day, why don't you take her plate up to her," she suggested.

Remus fidgeted for a moment and then nodded slowly, "You're right, she's probably famished."

He grabbed her plate and stood up to leave.

"Um, Remus?" Peter spoke hesitantly, "Let her know that if she really wants to beat me up, she can."

"Oh, no," protested Sirius, putting a comforting hand around Peter's shoulders. "Tell Avalon not to worry about it. James and I will beat him up for her."

Remus chuckled softly, walking away as Peter struggled to get out of Sirius' grasp. The quiet halls echoed his footsteps as he ascended to Gryffindor tower. The Common room welcomed him with a warm embrace, which he accepted gratefully after his long walk through the chilled halls.

Hoping that no prefects would suddenly appear and question his presence on the girls' side, Remus knocked hesitantly on Avalon's door to her dorm. No reply.

"Avalon?" Remus called out her name.

A few moments passed and he was about to repeat it when he heard a muffled response. He pushed the door open and let himself in; the door closed with a rather loud click. His eyes searched the room and fell across her form, laying with her back to him. Remus was across the room in just a few steps. He put the plate of food on her nightstand, next to a lit candle. Over the aroma the warm food, he could pick up the spicy scent of pumpkin.

He slowly dropped his weight on the bed and watched Avalon for a few minutes. The silence stretched out and he could no longer take it. "Avalon, talk to me, please," the werewolf pleaded.

For a moment, no response, but then, the girl drew her knees up, hugging them tightly. Remus opened his mouth to speak again, but Avalon sat up and turned to face him.

She had been crying, her warm cheeks damp from the tears and her yes were read and glossy. Remus' heart broke to see her like that. All he wanted to do at that moment was to hold her and reassure her that all was well.

His eyebrows went up in worry and gently, yet firmly, Remus pulled her into his arms. "Oh Avalon, I'm so sorry..."

Her body began shaking from her renewed sobbing. The young man found himself caressing her back, rubbing his hand in small circles over it.

"I...I saw him die, Remus," Avalon chocked out, "I tried to warn him...to stop all those deaths...but I couldn't do anything...not a damn thing.."

Remus stopped moving his hand but continued to hold her in the embrace, "You were here, at the school when it happened, there wasn't anything you could have done. You didn't even know it was happening."

Avalon bunched the front of his robes up in her fists. Her sobs had ceased once more. "Please don't tell anyone what I'm about to tell you...I'm sure I'll sound crazy." She pulled away from him and for a moment, Remus panicked, wondering if had done something wrong. But she tugged on his arm and he found himself sitting next to her, leaning back against the headboard of her bed.

With her hand in his, Avalon spoke again, "I had a really strange dream last night. But it wasn't a dream like go-to-bed-and-sleep-dream because I wasn't asleep. I had been in front of my mirror when suddenly I was outside, in some kind of park. It was like the article read, a group of muggles were attacked." Her voice started to quaver again, "No one could see me, except...I saw my father...right before he died, he saw me."

More silence. Not surprising, Remus didn't know what to say, yet felt that words weren't necessary anyway. He could hear muffled voices from below, supper must be over. Speaking of which, Avalon's was probably getting cold.

A rather loud rumble filled the room and Avalon tensed beside him. Another moment of silence, then she let out a small laugh. "Thanks for bringing some food up to me, I suppose I am a bit hungry."

Remus smiled at her and nodded, "Well, better hurry up and eat some...I don't think its very warm now..."

"Its okay," she pushed up from the bed and the young man followed. "You should probably go now, before anyway catches you and assumes the worst."

He continued to hold her hand, not wanting to leave yet. The voices downstairs were getting louder and he glanced over at the door with a sort of pouting look. Avalon grinned and pulled him over to the door, peeking out to make sure no one was in the hallway yet. Remus let her lead him out, still holding on to those warm hands.

"Okay, really Remus, you should go now..." He sighed and let go of her hand. He smiled sheepishly at her and turned to head over to his dorm. "Oh, Remus?"

As he turned back around to look at her, he was surprised to find himself with an armful of Avalon. She hugged him tightly and then pulled away slightly, looking up into his eyes. "Thanks for being there for me..." His eyes then widened as she leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. Before he could make a coherent response, she flashed a smile at him and was back in her room with the door closed.

Remus just stood there in shock for a moment before finally heading back to his dorm. James and Sirius were already in the room, throwing their nightshirts on. Both stared at Remus as he walked past them, completely ignoring, or not noticing their presence. Both boys stared after him with knowing grins and chuckled quietly to themselves. 

He was on autopilot, not even realizing that he had already changed and was in bed. The only thing that he was able to realize was that he was warm. For as long as he could remember, he had been cold and almost empty. After meeting the other boys, some of that had left, but now he felt so warm...so warm and full of life.


End file.
